Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be married to a man enlisted in an elite military unit? I certainly hadn’t… until I heard about Simone Gorrindo’s new memoir, The Wives, which gives us a peek behind the curtain into a world few of us ever think about. Throughout the book, Simone and her husband embark on a journey that’s both incredibly personal and globally relevant. From the decision to enlist through a cross-country move, basic training, and the long years after, we follow Simone through the ups, downs, and everything in between. What intrigued me about this book was that the author was not who I imagined an army wife would be – in fact, she’s the opposite. And that ended up being one of the many things I took away from this book – we often assume, and judge, even if we don’t do it consciously or purposefully, but people are complicated, and life is complicated, and you might be surprised by what you find when you take the time to look a little deeper. That initial intrigue made me start the book, but Simone’s story kept me turning the pages. She is so honest and vulnerable in her writing, and she leaves no tough topic untouched. She touches on everything from marital problems and political differences to mental health and self-identity while trying to navigate questions like what it means to serve your country, what it means to be a wife, a friend, a mother, and how you can be all of those things without losing yourself. Simone also invites the reader into her various relationships. First, there’s her marriage, where she attempts to juggle resentment and missing her husband with being supportive of his dreams and needs, but also struggles to reconcile loving a man who has killed other people and will continue to do so and understand his drive to lead this life. But there are also her friendships with titular wives, who form their own close-knit support system out of necessity. They may all find themselves alone and in the dark but soon find light within one another, even across the lines that divide most of the country. Simone dives deep into these relationships and her thoughts and feelings, going as far back as her childhood and her relationship with her parents to try and understand herself and how best to navigate her new world and she takes us with her through that exploration. I don’t read a lot of non-fiction, but I could not put this book down. I was invested in Simone and her journey and could not stop thinking about what it must be like. It’s the same fascination with another world that you have when you watch Bama Rush or listen to a true-crime podcast – you know it’s real, but it’s so different from your own reality. The Wives is one of the most vulnerable and complex memoirs I’ve ever read and it’s one that I will be thinking about for a long time to come.
The Wives by Simone Gorrindo, (List Price: $29.99, Gallery/Scout Press, 9781982178499, April 2024)
Reviewed by Emily Lessig, The Violet Fox Bookshop in Virginia Beach, Virginia
